I was going to put together something special in honor of it being Friday the 13th, but then Nicole Kidman was viciously attacked today by a rogue cyclist outside New York Fashion Week and, well, you understand.
One minute she's having a grande night with Rooney Mara and the next moment she's run down by another one of Suri's thugs. It's all too much.
Get drunk. Wear short shorts. Put out. If you're lucky, Jason will show up and all your dreams will come true.