Thursday, January 21, 2010

This is the moment...

Hello everyone and welcome to the first annual FaggotyAssAwards.  The red carpet is star-studded.  Just look at who came out to celebrate!



Barbra Streisand and her gay son, Jason Emanuel Gould...








Broadway songstress and star of ABC's Private Practice, Audra McDonald...













Brandon Routh...












That hot born-again Christian guy from Friday the 13th V: A New Beginning...


But, enough of all this hobnobbing, let's get to the awards!!  We all know that no self-congratulatory awards show is complete without a lavish production number:



I was once real hung up on some gay and my dear friend turned to me and said "Jeff, don't be Ali Larter. Look like Ali Larter."  No truer words were ever spoken. 

It is my honor to present this year's FaggotyAssAward for Best Actress to Miss Ali LARTER!!!!!



Ali couldn't join us this evening, but she was good enough to tape her acceptance speech.



Thanks for that, Ali.  We love you, too.

NOW. 
The moment you've all been waiting for!
The 2009 FaggotyAssAward for Best Movie goes to....


THE HOUSE OF THE DEVIL!!!


Good job, Ti West.

100days, you win the gift basket for referencing belladonna and for losing in both categories.

Everyone, go home. There's nothing more to see.

3 comments:

  1. Yo, Ali. I'm really happy for you, and I'll let you finish, but Isabelle Fuhrman had one of the best performances of all time. One of the best performances of all time!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Um, where is the category for Best Actor? Brandon Routh did not show up for nothing.

    ReplyDelete
  3. oh, BJ didn't show up for no reason.. Okay!!OKAY??!! Ladies...am i right?? ho!

    ReplyDelete